What is the definition I want myself and others to define me as?
Who am I?
Sometimes we get defined as something other then what we were hoping for. I recently heard a speaker talk about her experience of working in the primary on mothers day. The children all wrote down what they believed was their mothers favorite thing to do. she reported that most of the answers were vaccuming, cleaing etc. Is that who they are. I dont believe it. I want my family and friends to know who I am. I believe that is done through are actions. All these kids saw of there mother was doing the house hold duties. What do I want my kids, Elli, to see me and define me as. I also know that when we introduce ourself that is how some may define. When I started introducing myself I would say that I was a sewer...and I am but that is not all I am those who have known me in the last 5 years may believe that is who I am but my family that I grew up with know I can sew but know that I am alot more than that as they havn't even seen much of this sewing life of mine. So what is my definition? who defines that? Is what I see myself what others see me as? I have taken the time to write down what I want my definition to be. I encourage you to do it too.
I want others to define me as:
Confident
Beautiful
Fun
Happy
Someone You Can Talk To
Hard Worker
Lover of Learning
Daughter and Disciple of God
Full of Life
Now how can I do that? Is this who I am now?
Confident
I can be confident by speaking up: saying what I believe and believe it. Lately I have gotten in a rut of not really going up to talking to people - I need to break that - I love when others come to me - I need to go to them. In church and in the family I need to speak up even when it is against social norms.
I can be confident by owning my own, making my life choices and then embracing them. Know that with a choice some things don't come along but that I decided this was better.
I can be confident by loving myself. Not only accept but love the body, family, spirit, children, husband I have been blessed with.
I can be confident by knowing what I am doing is right - the Lord can bless me with the holy ghost when I make right choices. The holy ghost can direct me and I can go forward with faith and confidence.
Beautiful
I can be beautiful by being modest. I want others to see that I respect my body and love it. I would never want anyone to be uncomfortable around me and I want to be beautiful because of me and as the Lord see's beauty, not as the world sees it. I have a girl in my ward this way and she is truly beautiful. I just image when we were in heaven - truely beautiful modest beings.
I can be beautiful by having the light of Christ in me. I can shine by choosing attributes of my Heavenly Father and Mother and by following Christ's example. By knowing and being on the right path.
My sister in laws made a comment that I looked beautiful and was glowing. they just knew I must be pregnant....and I was. How can I get that glow to stick through pregnancy and beyond? What is that glow... excitement? blessedness?
I can be beautiful by taking care of myself. I am learning that this doesn't mean a mask of make up and it also doesn't mean rolling out of bed but taking the time to groom myself and being clean and presentable.
I can exercise - you know how when you don't exercise you feel groggy and blah, and when you do you feel energized - it allows a beauty glow too and it is taking care of your body.
Fun
I can be fun by taking the time to schedule fun - take hikes, walks, fun outings with my family or friends. I want to be the mom that doesn't just manage the house but allows for life and exploration to happen.
I need to keep trying things and doing the things I love.
I need to take time to play with Elli, whether it be taking along time to get home from a walk because I am interacting and playing with Elli or playing with her on the floor, having a dance party, etc. I also need to just go and have fun with Blake - to laugh together.
Happy
Growing up my parents always defined me as happy. I loved having that definition from them. They would say I would wake up each morning smiling. My dad calls me "Hey-there hi-there ho-there as happy-as-can be there" I loved this nickname! how can I continue this?
I can be positive. I can assume love from others. I can smile (as my husband always reminds me). I can not complain or whine. I need to just enjoy life and what I am blessed with.
I can compliment others/ serve others. My parents also taught that you get the most joy from serving others.
Someone You Can Talk To
This can be a struggle for me because a lot of the time I find me the one doing the talking. I do love listening and encouraging others though. I love to learn and share ideas together.
I want to talk to my children and Blake individually. let them know I feel they are important.
Dates with Blake or my children can do this, as well as special time with mom and dad, like pillow talk...I love pillow talk.
I can lead those who need help to God by reminding them to go to the Lord for strength.
I can be the one that approches others for conversation. This could show them that I enjoy talking with them.
Hard Worker
I can be a hard worker by stepping in when help is needed.
I can do my part in the family.
I can do hard things. Believe it, do it, embrace it.
Lover of Learning
I want to always be learning. I would love to study a topic, try it out, see what I like and apply it in my life.
I want to teach what I learn and always be growing in knowledge.
Daughter and Disciple of God
I can be an example of the believers.
I can make comments in Sunday class.
I can follow Christ.
I can bear my testimony often in formal and informal settings.
I can look at the big picture and set my goals on the eternal - living with God again.
I can keep trying to improve myself and repent and learn.
I can pray to my Father oft and seek His guidence.
Full of Life
I want to embrace life...to love it! when things come up- I can amplify it. I want to magnify my callings. I want to make traditions big and important. I want to have a rich life and love what I have and do. I can make life work right now- in what ever stage we are in. My mom once gave me the advice to not wait until its "that certain time" or "they have finally reached the right age" but to just embrace now because when the future time comes it may be hard too or you might just miss some awesome oppurtunitys and time.
